Allow Me to PREFACE... We really could do with a new Kitchen COUNTER. We also need a new SINK. We *desperately* NEED *NEW FAUCETS*!! -- [oh. wait. MOTHER already bought Some..]
-- We SERIOUSLY NEED "THEM" **INSTALLED**!!!
NOTE - Besides, being commonly referred to as "PRINCESS-POWER-TOOLS", MOTHER also goes by "PRINCESS-PLUMBER".
So... When I came up for Breakfast, instead of being greeted with the usual SATURDAY-YARD-SALE-SHOPPING-"SCHEDULE", I was met with an ominous scattering of the SCARY-STUFF-From-Under-the-SINK-CRAP spread out before Me!
-- not good...
I need My CHEERIOS...
I "concentrate" on THAT task, as the background-droning of, "...first I need to do the Dishwasher... then I want to start on the Taps no later than 3...", buzzes about over the sane-ness of My Chocolate-Chippy-cereal-crunching...
[INSERT the Part, where I really, REALLY *WISH* that My BROTHER was Living HERE!!]
FAST-FORWARD to *AFTER* I've...
- Stocked up on Drinking-Water.
- Changed into Grungy-Clothes.
- Sorted out the "PATH" to the WATER-SHUT-OFF-VALVE for FATHER - [His ONE Task to keep *busy* and OUT of Our Way!].
- Prepped the new Flashlight.
- Checked My E-mail...
- Munched some more.
- Pinched Myself to make sure that THIS wasn't some BAD DREAM about to unfold!
As The ELDERLY-FEMALE-PARENTAL-UNIT surveyed the "Challenge" ahead, I ploughed on with a weeding of the DEBRIS-field... Seriously? "WHAT" IS some of THIS STUFF??!! -- I filled the designated "HAZMAT"-Bag...
Whilst MOTHER went in search of the *appropriate* TOOLS - [that's She's ALWAYS purporting to Possess!??] - I went to retrieve My Shiny-RED-$3.-Yard-Sale-Find-IKEA-TRACTOR-SEAT-Wheeled-CHAIR from the Basement. The little Foot-Stool-Bench that I had hoped to use was just too LOW for Me to SIT on comfortably. [Nasty Lower-Back and Knee problems..]
right. so. I'm checking out the "INSTRUCTIONS" for These TAPS... oh-kaay... There's this DETAILED-Diagram of the "Handles", which is totally USELESS as the UNIT *already* comes ASSEMBLED!? duh! And, the Other TINY-Diagram that IS Useful, ended up being moot, as We had only needed ONE of the 3-Pieces! -- IT made those KINDER-SURPRISE-TOY Instructions look like ROCKET-SCIENCE!
Meanwhile, back to the *actual* PLUMBING... MOTHER has a LOT of HARDWARE. Just NOT necessarily ALL of the PROPER Tools! And, when She does, THEY seem to get Misplaced..?
EVENTUALLY, We got the NUTS and TUBES and WHAT-the-crap-EVERS UN-attached so I could LIFT-OUT the SINK! -- EEUWWW!! -- THANK YOU, DISPOSABLE GLOVES!
You know, THIS whole PROCEDURE, IT reminds Me of whenever The POWER goes OFF... You need to DO Something, but *can't* because You-NEED-Power! -- There was STUFF that NEEDED "Cleaning", BUT, We had NO WATER!!
We MANAGED... sorta...
We REALLY *probably* should have GOTTEN a NEW SINK, too! -- just saying...
FOUR-HOURS LATER... NO Leaks. SO FAR... The SINK remains in need of some Sealant around the Rim - some OTHER Time! -- Will have to get USED-TO the way the New-Knobs Turn..? Can't WAIT - or, not - to see IF the Dishwasher-Nozzle-Thingy will be ANGLED *Properly*!
Anyhoo... DESPITE, MOTHER's opinions to the Contrary, I now possess the "skill" of HOW-TO Change FAUCETS!! - woohoo!
-- HOWEVER, I think I'll just Stick to My YARN!!
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